I have so many reasons why I haven’t sent out my newsletter, so I will have to just put it under the umbrella of “life has been exceptionally eventful”. I guess before I ever entered this human body I signed up for all of these lessons which brings me to ask myself, “What the hell was I thinking?” I can’t say that any of it is bad or good because honestly experience has taught me that what I thought was a good thing wasn’t really what I needed and what I thought was bad turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me. I won’t go into details but I am on the path of getting physically stronger allowing me to move into the next chapter in my life, hence, “the wounded healer.”
For those of you who know me well, you know that I am committed to moving towards healing with sound. Not an original idea as it started with the Pythagorus, the father of mathematics, vegetarianism and harmonic sound healing along with being a gifted astrologer and astronomer. Music therapy is the more common of the modalities in the last 30 years, but the way I want to work is a little more about the use of the full harmonic spectrum than say, strumming a guitar while singing to the recipient. I will include essential oils, color and crystals – but the emphasis is on sound.
I have my tools, the template from which I want to work but what I don’t have in place is “me”. I have to heal me first. And even though I truly believe that this will work, I won’t really “know” until I utilize my template, on my own physical/mental/spiritual issues. There is a knowing and then there is a KNOWING. It seems to me that as healers (which I believe we all are) the insights into how we can be ministers of suffering especially in these times where many suffer specifically from the isolation that comes from our individualistic condition that we can call “nuclear man”, we have to journey through our own sufferings and isolation so that through our own wounds we too can offer a sincere healing. We heal by relating at a very deep level to the suffering of those we encounter. We speak of social issues like poverty, immigration or criminal justice but until we can integrate through our own experience the isolated feelings of marginalization, which at some level we all experience in different forms, then we are not addressing these issues at a spiritual level.
As a voice coach I’m good because I have been there. I lost my voice due to poor habits and then went through the long journey of finding my voice. Not only that, but I bring 40 years of experience to the student as I have been out in the field living a life of a musician. Though rewarding, it was mostly heartbreaking. I have learned many powerful lessons that I now can share. The student believes me because I am coming from a place of true passion, not a place of academia which frankly, I just have never been that interested in and had nothing to do with the grand teacher of them all, experience.
But on a larger scale we can look at all of our great teachers and/or messengers of truth. Ghandi, Buddha, Jesus, Mohammed, Moses, Bill W (founder of AA) and others…..they teach what they undertook , most of them by choice which makes it even more meaningful, their own journey of isolation and injustice. Through them we can enjoy the hope that comes through their redemptive suffering. Even in Greek Mythology, the wounded healer comes up over and over again. For example, the Titan god Prometheus, had been chained to a rock by Zeus, the chief Olympian god. Being chained to the rock was to be his (Prometheus') punishment for having previous stolen fire from Olympia as a gift to mortals. Each day Zeus' eagle would come and eat Prometheus' liver. Each night the liver would heal itself. Then the eagle would come again for his liver snacks. As stipulated by Zeus - Prometheus could only be released if (and when) an immortal offered to go to Tartarus and take his place. Going to Tartarus would mean the immortal was giving up his status as an immortal and would die. Chiron, being the son of Kronus and half-brother of Zeus, agreed to take the place of Prometheus, and then eventually died. Upon his death, he was then released from his wound that would never heal. Chiron was then honored with the constellation of Centaurus. Giving up one’s immortal life with a compassionate act is a lesson that I believe needs to be fine-tuned not only in me but if I can be so presumpitious, for mankind as well. What this world be like, if all we ever did was treat each other with compassion out of our own suffering?
This hope becomes our well spring through which our own suffering can offer others a vision of redemption. The reason these actions bring converts rather than ridicule is because the message of caring is not just an empty word but a living reality that people can see, feel and then benefit within the communal experience. In other words, wounds and weaknesses of all humanity are healed by the collective which is just another word for the divine SOURCE allowing a shared compassion due to our fellow human beings suffering.
When I look at my life and then turn an inward eye back out to my brothers and sisters, I am convinced that the reason we are all here is to learn, then live in love and compassion. Judgment is not mine to own but instead, removing judgment in an effort to retrieve the memory we must have all had at one time - we are all cells in the same body…. knowing that the single cell is only healthy as a whole. The inward eye is upon me. Once again the solution, the beginning, the vision lies within the hub of the wheel as my wounds may give measure of the knowledge and compassion to heal. After all, the deeper the pain that is exposed, the more universal it will be understood.
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